WHAT IS THE PRICE OF HAPPINESS GRANTED?

Happiness is an elusive commodity in the human psyche. For many who depend on material possessions for happiness, it can be fleeting and comes at potentially a great monetary cost.

This article is about three "magic words" that can bring happiness to others and yourself at ZERO monetary cost, only the cost of a simple thought.

Happiness is defined by the Merriam-Webster Dictionary as:

"a state of well-being and contentment".

The Cambridge Advanced Learner's Dictionary defines it as:

"feeling, showing or causing pleasure or satisfaction".

Other dictionaries and encyclopedias have similar definitions.

For many people in materialistic cultures (and there's nothing wrong with material possessions, far from it, we often need them) this happiness is only achieved by the collection and accumulation of things. Such happiness is temporary at best, for when the "shock of the new" ends, the excitement phase is over and the possession becomes a routine thing or even less, taken for granted and ignored unless needed. Appreciation dwindles down to commonplace expectation.

Human beings are more than collectors, and human happiness is a complex emotional feeling dependent on many variables, not the least of which are other human beings! This human variable concerns us here.

When we take things for granted, we expect them to be there. We don't appreciate them for being there at all. How many of us go to sleep at night, expecting to wake up to a new day? How many of us open the fridge, expecting to get a cold drink or some other preserved food? How many of us expect to turn on the hot water tap and get flowing hot water?

The Universe is very well balanced and designed, so we can pretty much expect a new day to dawn when we go to sleep at night. Not so with human invention. How does it feel when we open the fridge, and it stinks and everything is warm because the machine we expected to function flawlessly has developed a problem? How does it feel when we turn on the hot water tap, and cold water emerges?

We MISS the cold of the fridge, the hot of the water, and of course, we take steps to correct the problem. But what was missing up until these experience? We missed APPRECIATING what we had, and which we now must restore. We took it for granted, rather than appreciated what we had.

Most of us have no idea how a fridge works, so we don't appreciate all that makes it work so flawlessly and well. We don't know how a hot water heater works, so we don't appreciate what goes on to make that hot water possible. We EXPECT these things to work without problems, and therein lies the key.

The Key to Happiness is: APPRECIATION.

Life has no guarantees, yet we EXPECT life to provide instead of appreciate THAT life provides!

With machines designed to perform a function day in and day out, that is relatively understandable. But we can feel some happiness if we look at the things they do provide and think, "I appreciate that this is there for me and that it does provide." Instead of a dull sense of expectation, we generate a sense of well being, of being cared for.

What about our health? We expect our hearts and lungs and other organs to work perfectly day in and day out, regardless of what we do to them. Many heart attack victims have said things like:

"I never appreciated my heart until the day I wound up in the hospital with a heart attack."

Our health is not guaranteed and is not something we can take for granted. The more we appreciate it, the more we automatically work to maintain it. When we are healthy, we have a level of physical happiness, for we have well being.

This goes further -- to our human interactions.

We all have something that is unique, but that we take for granted every single day.

Imagine life with no people! Have you ever been in a city or town very early in the morning when no one is around, and felt the emptiness? Sometimes, people go into the woods or some place in nature to be alone and get away from it all. This can provide a sense of relief from "too much of a good thing" (other people). But suppose you did this and had an accident?

Who would come to your rescue? Would the deer and bears and other wild creatures lift a paw or claw to help you?

Among all the creatures of the Earth, human beings are the only ones who routinely come to each others assistance.

Appreciation of each other is a very important Key To Happiness.

The author of The Crystal Cauldron had an interesting comments about appreciation. She wrote:

"I think some sort of feedback and appreciation is so important in whatever we are doing. To be honest I think a lot of people do value things but forget to tell the other person."

Maybe it is time to remember!

There is a popular movement going around called "The Law of Attraction". It is a type of philosophical practice for improving one's life through the application of several principles. One of these is: gratitude. Gratitude is a synonym for appreciation. So when we express appreciation, we express gratitude, and thus apply one of the principles of the Law of Attraction. It only takes a few magic words to do this every day in every situation, and it costs absolutely nothing.

There are three magic words in the English language, and they have equivalents in all other human languages.

They are "Please" and Thank You".

What makes them magical?

For one thing, they convey respect and recognition. For another, they acknowledge appreciation.

How do they work?

When we say "please" to someone, we acknowledge that they have absolutely no reason to help us. Indeed, no one is naturally obligated to help another. The idea of assisting or helping others is part of the philosophy of altruism, but it has no natural drive or causality. We show respect that they will follow their innate human compassion ( a uniquesly human trait) and provide assistance. That assistance may be as simple as telling us the time of day, or lifting us out of a ravine!

When we hear the word "please", we receive acknowledgment that the person asking for something from us is recognizing our value. We are more prone to providing the assistance because we are respected.

When we say "Thank you" we acknowledge to the person who has provided something that we appreciate what they have done. It's not a question of value or quantity-- the fact is that any person who does anything to help another deserves recognition by the recipient -- even if they sell us something (they don't have to sell anything to us, after all.)

This has two functions.

• It makes us aware of our appreciation.
• It makes the other person feel valued.

I ride the public transportation bus every day. Every day, when I depart the bus, I turn to the driver and say "Thank You".

Someone heard this one day and asked me:

"Why did you thank the driver. He was just doing his job, he doesn't deserve thanks!"

I replied:

"I said it because I appreciate his skill at his job; that he has the job; and he does it as well as he does. Also, did you see the smile on his face? That is priceless."

The stranger walked away shaking her head in disbelief. Apparently, she had no room in her world for appreciation and I felt a bit sorry for her. You see, I had gained something that eluded her. I gave the driver and myself a little happiness through the act of appreciation, even in this small interaction.

In the currency of joy, it possibly had only the value of a penny, but those pennies add up!

I noticed that appreciation, like happiness, is contagious. The next time I got off the bus and said "Thank you" to the driver, the people behind me did the same!

In the marketplace of human emotion, there are many options and many costs. Happiness is accounted as the most important of all human emotions, for when we are happy, we are capable, functional, and enjoy life.

The price of happiness can be expensive, the cost of some thing, or it can be simply the price of remembering and using the three magic words.

Happiness is a bit like love -- the more you give, the more you have, for both, potentially, are infinite.

We have the ability to increase our happiness and increase the happiness of others; it is those three magic words. It costs nothing but a thought to say the three magic words to others, and it can make a world of difference in your outlook as well as the outlook of others.

Imagine a world where every single human being is living in a state of happiness. What would such a world be like? Would there be room for anger, resentment, argument, conflict? Or would it be a world filled with smiling people helping each other, acknowledging each other and cooperating to improve the quality for life for all? Is this an achievable Utopia?

It can be achieved, one step and one day at a time, all it takes is the three magic words, and happiness, like a well watered flower, grows and blossoms.

Considering the value and benefits of happiness, it seems worth the price, in fact, it's a bargain!